It has been a few months since I have felt such a burning need to go on a media-sparked tirade. I am going to keep this one short and vitriolic, as I do not wish to add too much to the sheer volume of words already misspent on the subject. Some of you may guess where this is heading. That is correct. I am talking about the wholly manufactured uproar over a photograph--either real, photoshopped, or just a case of 'bad lighting'--of Madonna's creepy arms. Personally, I do not give a fig, a farthing, or a f*** what the culprit is. Is she too thin? Does she work out too much? Was the image unethically altered? Was she, from a lighting standpoint, simply at the wrong angle at the right time? Stop the madness, please.
If we are to believe the whore mongers of the Internet Media Brigade, this is an issue of great and desperate importance--worth any amount of brain cells, eye-sight, and time needed to wade through the complexities to find the truth. In the midst of this absurd scramble to get the scoop--which has nothing to do with honour, professional ethics, or even basic journalistic ability--the bigger picture has been obfuscated: the subject at hand is arms, people, arms. No, not that kind. How silly you must feel if your mind automatically turned to such a declasse subject as weaponry, nuclear or otherwise. Suck it, North Korea: next to the freaky appendages of a celebrity, your attempts to cow America have gone sadly unnoticed this week. Better luck next time.
If you have not given Madonna's physique any thought, beyond laughing hysterically as you passed up the dangled carrot of an AOL or Yahoo headline, then kudos to you--you have a mind that can think independently of TMZ. Let me be clear here: I am not solely an ice-princess intellectual-type. I find pop culture fascinating and addicting, but only up to the point where I can still use my own brain. A little bit of Perez or People goes a long way: I do not buy into this lab-produced fakery wholesale.
The other half of this madness is, of course, being told what it is we should find interesting, important or relevant by people who have built entire careers on the fact that they like to gossip. It has been suggested, with some frequency over the last few years, that we should answer these increasingly obvious and annoying media blitzes with indifference to the current subject (Lindsay Lohan, Paris Hilton, Speidi, the Gosselins and so on).It is a fine concept on paper but would only work if rational people ruled the world.
Madonna (and her arms-'o-horror)is just the fetish of the moment. The "story", though currently peppering the Internet like mines in a field, will soon be thrust aside to make way for the next fatuous, media-fueled obsession. Large gestures, unless done collectively by millions, are not likely to work. Doing your part on an intimate scale--simply refusing to click on the headlines or commenting on that sort of blog-article (even a negative comment is attention)--is probably the best that can be done, and is no small thing. Remember: By paying these hacks any heed, we allow mice to become Titans--it is no wonder they have come to rule over us all.
Man, thank goodness. I thought you were going to say something about the Michael Jackson phenom. You know, he died recently.
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